"I thought that since we were here, we could stay. I thought I could do something to make that true," he says.

He hates his own inability to do that, something he feels is a weakness even if it's just literally out of everyone's control. And it scares him a little, in the place where he still admits to any fear at all. If any of them could disappear, then he could. And that's a lot worse than any of the others leaving, though of course he won't bring that up to Jean.